life certainly is bizzare sometimes, everytime I think I have any part of it figured out it is ripped away from me, conversly everytime I think it has all come to naught something happens or some epiphony hits me and I can once again see a part of it clear as day and am filled with it's sence of wonder at knowing at least in part what it was all for. I have cursed The ultimate power of the universe probably more times than I can count but I find that my relationship with that power is stronger and more meaningful. It becomes more full when we can argue, when we can share a differnece of opinions, be mad and still work together. I have found that I have more power through them and I have also found that at last I crave power. probably not the power that you would imagine I crave. It is not the power to bend wills or know ones mind or power to rule or to be observed as powerful. The power I crave is to communicate with the life force itself, to be able to manifest my very thoughts by simply asking the very bonds of molecules to shift or change, not because I ask them to, but because they want to. I am keenly aware that If I whole heartedly ask I will be granted this ability, but I am not certain yet that I want the consiquences of taking on such a responcibilty. To be able to heal with a single touch, to be able to awaken the bugs splattered on your windshield, to be able to change and rearrange molecules is something that does not come without questioning and and entire change in the perception of ones self by general public. There will be no provacy and mercy and there will be those who do not understand and will worship that which seems godly but is nothing more than any of them could do themselves if they wanted to, not want as in I want something to eat, but as in a want that is so consuming that your believes alter what we consider reality.

   [ POSTED BY Penelope @ 8:37 PM ] [ ]